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My Answer to Turning Postpartum Blues to Beautiful Golds

Posted on September 12th, 2014 by | 2 views

Like me, I invite you to glean just one little new mommy nugget and call it a mothering WIN that will last you a lifetime.

It’s Summer Solstice! Perhaps so very obviously, rather than being out and under the sun I am nestled in bed. That’s right, tucked away in the warmth of my new Son’s arrival. At nearly four days old he is pure bliss, gentle, engaging, soft, and dreamy. Butter and beauty baby!

The Gemini-ness he came through with is alive and well within our family - nearly every tender moment turned to chaotic furry. Okay with just taking it all in stride, my milk is heavy and my heart is yearning to create a new dream - a Solstice inspired dream that I’m TRUSTING will come true!

In the dark of my room I envision a new home, new work, new relationships, new adventures, and new landscapes. I dare also to feel part of something else right now - a celebrating life with others rather than feeling held within a bubble that no one else can really be a part. That is, until this ink hits the screen and gratitude takes me.

Yes, I write with intent that the therapeutic value of putting words onto white will help to befriend this taste of postpartum loneliness that I’m experiencing. This bit of loneliness is neither good nor bad, but both made neutral, as Gemini would have it.

Each of us, of course, taste the flavor as humans but my imaginings have had me feeling that maybe not for so many of us today, on a day more seemingly suited to swimsuits and dance jams over a peek into the reality that it’s only me who has just moved through a major initiation. That is in becoming a new momma to this beloved boy.

Already though, the crafting of letters has reminded me that the Solstice knows not of the bounds that drawn curtains pretend. Again, I’m reminded that these first few days of a newborn’s life are easily the most climatic bonding experiences. Yep, today as the sun is high in the sky I get the extended opportunity to feel my Son's Soul move further into his body - to reflect all that IS - the vast enormousness of our visions pulled inward to spark the potential for the rest of our lives.

It’s all making sense then that the sparks for a new dream are flying like fireflies inside of me now. Here I’ve come half way through the year with the goals of a healthy pregnancy, delightful birth, and thriving baby all realized! Right along has been the recognition that my super duper Gift is inviting in, accessing, and activating TRUST! This last ten months has given me plenty of practice - cultivating it to the point that I can no longer argue the message, that this makes my healing and advising skills especially valuable.

The cherry on the cake is Baby Oddyn showing up with his Moon Sign in Pisces. A Moon Sign’s placement in a baby’s chart confirms our gifts - those our little ones have an extra special fondness! So check this out - Oddyn picked me for my ability to give it up to God! I feel honored and humbled. Most simply, it's pretty dang cool that he chose me for my willingness to TRUST and then made me work my ass off to realize the truth in it. Clearly, my newborn has gifted me with new purpose and this, my friend, makes motherhood a match for me.

From the get go in an early blog about my pregnancy I claimed that my pregnancy was planned … by someONE certainly! On a logistical level however, I came face to face with feelings of ill-preparedness the whole way through. As if our lives should already be set up with more money and less compromising, to name some biggies. And because this is real life stuff, I had to get off my duff and put on my big girl panties - but not at the expense of letting the rational world get the best of me. This is where the TRUST came in. The best thing to do was keep returning to it, just as if it really was the only option!

Choice-point after choice-point I got to pick … TRUST over fear, TRUST over denial, TRUST over explanation, TRUST over lack, TRUST over proving, TRUST over regret, TRUST over sadness, TRUST over judgment, TRUST over constriction, TRUST over pain, TRUST over anger, TRUST over resentment, TRUST over blame … TRUST over all the damn questioningSmile

It did the trick, right up till the end when more scream inducing questions surfaced,  “Why can’t I be more of a mainstream mom who goes to the hospital for birthing meds”, why, I argued, do I have to be so wise about naming numerology and unwilling to bend the numbers for a more pronounceable spelling of Oddyn’s Norse-God name? Yeop, TRUST blew those guys right out of the water too.

So here with the celebrated Sun upon us and my nursling SON as my musing witness I bow to the spark of my Soul who believes that a fresh start is not only possible but probable! With a firm belief that TRUST is one of the greatest powers in the Universe I am willing to accept that I am no longer just a light worker, but a light creator ….  As I TRUST that you are now too … on the other side of this 2014 Summer Solstice Initiation.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, with this story to back the truth of it, checking into your Baby-Mommy Moon-Sign dynamic will turn your blues to beautiful golds by reminding you of the one little nugget that you need to and will naturally nurture. I promise, knowing what you can't screw up is sure to have you feeling better and my Awesome Mommy Bundle will see you to it!

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